Mindfulness

Sure-ness


My bodywork and movement education practice, much like everything else in my life, is changing.

It’s growing. I can see even more now how much of my influence is based off of my intent, my approach, and my energy. Much of the change, too, is driven by inner sure-ness.

I’ve come to a place of believing in myself and my abilities. I can still get nervous or apprehensive when approaching performance or social situations, but even in the jitters, there’s something different. I’m sure of myself. I know I can. I know I will.

I’m starting to realize, too, how much information I have. This goes along with some of the reflex and sensory integration work that has come together recently–it always felt difficult for me to retrieve and explain information. Even though I had it and I knew it, the lack of external translation could, at times, make it seem like it simply didn’t exist. Now that the boundary between the internal and external world are gone, the information flows (for the most part) freely, even if apprehension is there. In a nutshell, I’m starting to realize how much I know and understand.

Today my sessions with the girls were focused on freeing different areas of their bodies. I also  focused on playing in different levels of the doability perspective: can, will, and is.

Through a mixture of Hanna Somatics and bodywork, along with intention and refined connection/communication, both horses began to really unwind. The difference in their movement and standing before and after was quite amazing to me.

I’ve seen the same levels of influence and improvement in human clients, in other areas of my life, and in myself.

I’m always amazed at this life thing. Always learning, always growing. I’m so happy to be able to experience each moment so fully.

 

***

The sketch of this big German Shepherd-like guy (ears didn’t fit on the page, unfortunately) to me represented sureness–it was in a time when I had very little, and for some reason, when I drew this he made me feel steady. I had him on the wall above my bed for a long time, and every time I looked at it, I would feel more stable and more sure of myself, and also more hopeful for the future. I could look at him and remind myself that it was okay to feel unstable. Cherish also often represented this for me. These two helped me find sureness in a time when I had none–funny enough, what I didn’t realize is that that sureness I felt from them… the feeling was still coming from inside of me.

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