An initiation of change from a decision. A decision that has rippled out to affect my entire life. Thanks to my mom for capturing this photo and Aimee Brimhall-McCord for creating the space for others to realize their change.
Love is gentle. Love is kind. Love involves fluctuation, adaptation, give and take. Love is a choice.
I’ve been thinking a lot about choices recently–the choice to wake up early, the choice to be productive, the choice to simplify things so that it’s easier to do everything that’s most important.
I’ve also been thinking about how we make choices. I often make choices through logical explanation, reasoning, and a lot of overthinking and circling around, a lot of stress, and a lot of indecision… and finally, at the last moment (essentially when I have to), a choice.
This causes me a lot of grief, a lot of hours, and a lot of frustration. How not fun is that?
Recently I’ve been playing with the concept of simplifying, and adding in some flow and some heartspace. For those of you who aren’t familiar with these concepts, I’ve written the general idea below.
Heartspace: Feel the area around your heart. Feel love, compassion, kindness, or another positive emotion that you can access. Breathe into that emotion. Imagine a time where you felt that very vibrantly. Bring it into this moment. Allow yourself the space to share that with yourself and others into this moment.
Flow: Letting loose, softening, not being so mechanical… feeling. Moving. Not getting stuck.
So I’ve been applying these concepts to the idea of making decisions. I’ve been timing myself–giving myself five minutes, let’s say. I wasn’t open to this idea at first, but decided to try it anyway. I got to a point where I was desperate to not be drawn out into a long and dramatic epic of decision making. Then I breathe into my heart. I bring up that positive, loving feeling–whatever flavor it takes on today. I bring up the opportunity, the decision, the question. I sit on the options. Feel into them. Feel how my heart, my self, my emotions respond. I honor that. I notice. I might ask another question, or I might just feel into it more. Often though, I get a simple answer.
I might also take a few minutes (also timed) to make a chart, to appeal to my inner logic referee.
I do this to soothe my worries… but then, at the end of the time, I make a decision. I always take both into account… but honestly, my heartspace hasn’t lied yet. It’s usually what I want, what I need, what makes sense… And even when it hasn’t been the easiest or the most logical decision with the information I have at the moment, it’s usually clear a few weeks or months down the road how that decision carved an important path into my life.
So… try it. Try simplifying your choices and decisions.
First, set the intention: I’m going to actually MAKE one. Not flounder. Require that it be simple. Clear.
Then, timer. Heartspace.
If you need to, time again. Create a rational chart. Keep it simple.
Now, decide. Jump to it. Dive in. 100%.
And accept… whatever you decide, if you really don’t like it… Life is always changing. You have more choices to come. If you don’t like it, make another choice. To change.
Thanks to Aimee Brimhall-McCord for being open to us using her word “Heartspace” in our language